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Moe Zapfoe
Mr. Jack Handey
"I don't think I'm alone when I say I'd like to see more and more planets fall under the ruthless domination of our solar system."
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"Instead of mousetraps, what about baby traps? Not to harm the babies, but just to hold them down until they can be removed?"
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"I'd like to see a nude opera, because when they hit those high notes, I bet you can really see it in those genitals."
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"I hope if dogs ever take over the world, and they chose a king, they don't just go by size, because I bet there are some Chihuahuas with some good ideas."
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